Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Sex At Sea

Vero Beach FL
2010 11 21

Remember Freud and his lovely theory that the Sex Drive is the most important motivating force in the human psyche.  And then there is Maslow and his tantalizing hierarchy of needs describing that people first seek food and sex and then an escalating scale of psychological needs such as safety, love and finally self actualization.

What a pair of frauds.  For sure neither of these dudes ever cruised.

Any cruise begins as a journey of self actualization - I mean who exactly put your butt in the helm of that tiny sailboat in those 20 foot seas with the 35 knot winds?

Safety is a pipedream - after our last cruise none of my muscles were available to be torn - they were all in emerg getting stitched up.  My bruises had bruises.  And I knew it would end this way before I started.  Maslow should try making tea while a 22 footer poops his cockpit and tosses a few hundred gallons of mucky green fish mucous all over you and your cuppa.  And you are there by choice.

Love takes a distant second place to need - I need someone to take the helm right damn now cause if I don't get another reef in the bloody main we're gonna turtle. 

Then there is sex.  At least it is somewhere.  There is no sex on a cruise and if you wonder why well just climb on a waterbed and have someone strike the side of your house repeatedly with wrecking ball.  If the boat motion  doesn't put you off then worry about the fact no one is on watch does.  Or that odd creaking sound that wasn't there two minutes ago.

And food.  Right.  We eat a lot of fish and a lot of soda crackers.  Mostly soda crackers, especially when the seas and the wind picks up and boat starts tossing.  Four days of fresh fish and I would kill for a decent soda cracker.

So Freud and Maslow - you were bright guys.  You've just never sailed.

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